Posted by: Ashley Baker | June 2, 2012

10 Things A Rock Would Say If It Could Talk

Since I’m normally away from home most of the day on Sunday, here’s a little something to keep you amused until I stop being a pest to WMS and DH.

1.) “Will you stop stepping on my face already?!”

2.) “Could you kick my wife and kids back over this way? They’re the gray ones over there.”

3.) “Please put me down. I don’t like heights.”

4.) “What kind of world is this, where a rock gets stepped on while it’s trying to sleep?”

5.) “Ma’am, you should really wear panties under that skirt.”

6.) “My kids suffocated because someone decided to paint them. At least they look cute as decorations.”

7.) “I find your jokes about rocks and hard places to be very offensive.”

8.) “Even zombies get more respect than rocks…”

9.) “Just because we’re rocks doesn’t mean we don’t need to breathe. So stop throwing my family in the lake!”

10.) “If I had hands, I’d hit you.”

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